Hello World - this is my first blog on Blogger, so I'm feeling my way and looking forward to people's responses.
The Dalai Lama and Buddha, amongst others, talk a lot about kindness. I work in the field of conflict resolution and human happiness (see http://www.conflictadvice.com/ ) and I found myself thinking - on the way back from my yoga class the other night - about how much time we can spend keeping a conflict going - I include myself in this; on a bad day I'm my best example!
I am definitely not talking about just faking being nice all the time. (I feel strongly about striving to be real - I did come here to be me!) But so often, especially with lower grade conflicts, there is an initial action by someone - maybe they say or do something or push my buttons somehow. Then that incident is over and the real fight begins: head mileage! Something that took 2 minutes to occur now becomes hours, days, sometimes years of fighting and frequently most of it takes place in our heads. I/us humans can get so stuck. Not that our pain isn't real. But it's stuck.
My feeling is that this is one of the quickest ways to ruin your own happiness, not to mention health. It really stuffs up the day - the night too if you're arguing head miles instead of sleeping.
I've got a happiness barometer that I try to keep operating -if it's too hard to just drop the conflict I attempt to become Action Woman. "Find a way - don't give up. The cost is too great!" I'm a possibility slogan, but it's a challenge I like, with happiness as the payoff.
